This whole weekends was a bit of a blur. For the first time in months I actually went out, with friends! It was so crazy. 🙂
The best part about this weekend was that I went out and saw people I’ve always known but never really been friends with, since I am on the journey to deciding what I want to be, why not start with discovering what is around me? Long story, and lots of alcohol later, the night was wonderful.. Friday night that is. Then its time for Saturday, the birthday party.
All my friends and I love to celebrate our birthdays, and we love even more to make the other have a good time for theirs. The past couple years, my lifelong best friend and I have been in different places of our lives to get to spend our birthdays together. Saturday we finally got to have a birthday party together. Trish joined our lives longer than we had thought ago, which we discovered when I couldn’t remember how old she was because it just didn’t seem like we have been celebrating that many birthdays together, but we have.
The three of us sad in the corner of a packed bar, listened to music, talked, people watched, but got to be together. It was magic. They are my people. No matter what happens or how long we go without each other, they are a phone call away and always there for me. These are the people I want in my life. We didn’t have to deal with the drama that comes along with the group of girls we usually hang out with, we just enjoyed life. They have a goal to find me a boyfriend, or let me be a little… trollop sometimes and live through me. It wasn’t what I wanted to do. That wasn’t what I wanted to be to someone.
Over my short lifetime, I have slept with my fair share of males.. then never talked to them again. It’s easier this way, no emotional attachment. Not anymore, I’m not that person anymore. Even if I do sound like a broken record, I want to be a better me. And that me wants something real with someone, not just an orgasm and a ride home.